Illinois takes a stand on nonprofit hospitals

Last April, I commented on the increasing problem of nonprofit hospitals shirking their duty to provide some percentage of services for free.

Yesterday, The Chicago Tribune described the current situation in Illinois, where this issue recently came under the spotlight. Public hospitals turned away patients who couldn't pay and then received statewide attention. Now, it has become a state issue and, in Illinois, it will be up to the court to decide how much charity a nonprofit hospital must provide to maintain it's tax-free status. Though this is a positive step because it will draw attention to the problem and possibly encourage hospitals in other states to take a closer look at their annual charity rates in comparison with their bottom line, it is compounded by the fact that the courts have no precedent for how to set a fair "charity quota."

Vendor Power!

Great new video by Internets Celebrities on the state of the street vending market in NYC- take a look:



12 minute video, but definitely worth the watch.

Probably OFN, but here it is...

So, many of you may have already seen this (and other) videos of this kid in the red shirt with the dance moves (that are either totally awesome or just... proof that he is destined for failure in life).



Regardless, this video might make you wonder, "what's gonna happen to this kid if he's this awesome/not awesome now?" Never fear. Some dear friends have answered that very question for us here with Dance Moves that Rock (15 Years Later...):





Ok, now you can berate me for never actually posting on Raamin's blog and for posting old, worthless news. blah blah blah.

So Kanye ain't so bad

I recently lost the bulk of my music collection, so I'm having a good time rebuilding it with stuff that I find online. Lately, I've found that the bulk of my music is coming from the always-entertaining Kanye West, on his surprisingly excellent blog. In addition to putting up some really incredible art and design, Kanye uploads some of what I presume are his top music pics at any given moment.

You get gems like this:

Diddy's Group Dirty Money Releases "Angels" Music Video from the.LIFE Files on Vimeo.

Along with some other incredible tracks like these (click through to listen:
KID CUDI "PURSUIT OF HAPPINESS" (FEAT. MGMT & RATATAT)
KID CUDI "SOUNDTRACK 2 MY LIFE"
FOREVER

Check out his blog online at KanyeUniverseCity.com/blog


Anybody else got any good blogs they regularly pull music from?

Slate's News Dots

From the "just became my homepage" department:

Slate's got this new thing they call "news dots" that's basically a relationship map for news stories of the day. They pick about 500 news outlets and submit them to Calais, which tags them. It then takes those tags and plots the relationships out, and the result is pretty interesting:



Check it out at Slate. It's like playing 6 degrees of separation with Barack Obama (who is by the way only 2 steps away from Milwaukee).

Week roundup

So here's what I've been wasting my time with recently- because you've all been deprived of my ramblings for close to a week now.

HT to the lovely Jasmine for this one:
Michael Jackson medley- all sung by this one guy



CANABAULT- this may be the best flash game in the history of the world
Canabault
My high score is ~3900. I'm still pissed that Adam managed to kick my ass with ~4200. If you top me, let me know and I'll punch you in the face.

The new Modern Warfare 2 Trailer- this one needs a few comments
1) either these guys are playing against total scrubs or that battle shield the teammate is carrying is way overpowered
2) throwing knife kill at the end is INCREDIBLE
3) "Modern Warfare" was CoD:4, so I'm definitely calling this game "Call of Duty 4:2".



HT to Shyam- this one's just hilarious



So I've been researching law schools this past week- and HT to Connor for this one. The 10th edition of the Thomas Cooley School of Law's official rankings are out! And Thomas Cooley ranks... (drumroll please)... 12th! Up from 16th last year! Wow! Great job, Cooley! Let's take a look at the top 15:

1- Harvard University
2- Georgetown University
3- New York University
4- University of Virginia
5- University of Texas
6- University of Michigan
7- Northwestern University
8- Columbia University
9- Yale Law School
10- George Washington University
11- University of Minnesota
12- Thomas M. Cooley Law School
13- Fordham University
14- University of California-Los Angeles
15- American University

Well, I guess Stanford and UPenn aren't that good anyway, right?

Watch this space for more in this next coming week- I've got classes again, which means abundant time to blog. woot.

Is the US government better than a hedge fund?

So it looks like the TARP didn't end up being as much of a tarp as we thought it would be... According to Slate, it looks like TARP might actually end up breaking even, if not actually making money. What started out as a $700 billion line item expense on last year's budget is starting to produce returns- better than hedge funds in some cases. FTA:

Morgan Stanley, which borrowed $10 billion in October 2008, redeemed the preferred shares in June and purchased the warrants for $950 million on Aug. 12, giving taxpayers a return of 12.7 percent, according to SNL Financial.

Not bad, Morgan Stanley. And they're not the only ones, either:

For the 21 companies that bought back the shares and the warrants, the taxpayer received an annualized return of 17.5 percent—which is better than most hedge funds have done in the past year.

You go, government! Show those hedge funds what's what!

Now granted, the group of institutions that have paid back the bailout funds is going to suffer from serious self selection bias, but even so the results are encouraging. The market making its slow recovery has even been helpful for the government-

Treasury in July converted the initial $25 billion CPP loan to Citi into common stock, at a price of $3.25 a share. The U.S. taxpayer now holds 7.69 billion shares. Given its close Thursday at $5.05, taxpayers have reaped a $13.8 billion paper gain from this investment—a 55 percent return in about a month.

Damn. I wish I could manage my own money that well, but I'm happy Uncle Sam is doing his job well. It looks like we could end up making money on TARP, which seems better than even the more optimistic projections that were made during the height of the crisis. Still, it's important to keep in mind that any money we make is just icing on the cake. Counselor to the Treasury Secretary Lee Sachs said it best:

"Dividends: 5 percent, equity warrants, 2 percent. Financial system not going into total abyss: priceless."

via Slate

Jay-Z is the Hegemon of Hip-Hop

Looks like Jay-Z is getting attention from more than just NPR for his massive role in the hip-hop scene- XXL is running a cover story on his rather thorough financial domination of the industry- calling him "hip-hop's ultra businessman". Not bad, Jay-Z. FTA:

“But when I say I’m the best, I don’t say that outta my ass. I say that with all my stats behind me. I put that against anybody. I mean anybody. I really believe that… I believe in a lot of things. 
I believe that ‘SportsCenter’ is the best thing on TV. I shouldn’t have to prove it. But I do have these stats to prove it. I’m talking about real run. I’m not talking about years off. I’m talking about straight—boom, boom, boom—back to back. We’re not talking about heritage acts either. We’re not talking about respect what I’ve done. I’m talking No. 1 [albums] 10 times. The Beatles is the only one [to have more 
No. 1 albums]. They got 19, and if I get a surge of creativity, I could make nine albums next year.”

The magazine hits stands on September 15, so check this space for an update once the article actually posts. Meantime, check out my post on the hip-hop ecosystem as high diplomacy HERE.

(via XXL Magazine)

Is "peak oil" a near-term myth?

Michael Lynch in the NY Times yesterday put together an excellent (in my opinion) op-ed explaining why time spent worrying about "peak oil" in the near term is a time wasted. FTA:

A careful examination of the facts shows that most arguments about peak oil are based on anecdotal information, vague references and ignorance of how the oil industry goes about finding fields and extracting petroleum.

While Lynch may be a bit over-dramatic in his attacks, he makes good points to counter the proponents of the theory on their contentions. Among them (FTA):

One leading proponent of peak oil, the writer Paul Roberts, recently expressed shock to discover that the liquid coming out of the Ghawar Field in Saudi Arabia, the world’s largest known deposit, is around 35 percent water and rising. But this is hardly a concern — the buildup is caused by the Saudis pumping seawater into the field to keep pressure up and make extraction easier. The global average for water in oil field yields is estimated to be as high as 75 percent.

...

Let’s take the rate-of-discovery argument first: it is a statement that reflects ignorance of industry terminology. When a new field is found, it is given a size estimate that indicates how much is thought to be recoverable at that point in time. But as years pass, the estimate is almost always revised upward, either because more pockets of oil are found in the field or because new technology makes it possible to extract oil that was previously unreachable. Yet because petroleum geologists don’t report that additional recoverable oil as “newly discovered,” the peak oil advocates tend to ignore it. In truth, the combination of new discoveries and revisions to size estimates of older fields has been keeping pace with production for many years.

...

In the end, perhaps the most misleading claim of the peak-oil advocates is that the earth was endowed with only 2 trillion barrels of “recoverable” oil. Actually, the consensus among geologists is that there are some 10 trillion barrels out there. A century ago, only 10 percent of it was considered recoverable, but improvements in technology should allow us to recover some 35 percent — another 2.5 trillion barrels — in an economically viable way. And this doesn’t even include such potential sources as tar sands, which in time we may be able to efficiently tap.

Now I'm no oil expert (my heritage notwithstanding), but these arguments seem relatively well-founded. And the NY Times commenter population seems to have roughly the same intellectual capacity as a toasted marshmallow, so when I turned there for intelligent discourse I came up short.

So anyone have any idea if this guy is talking out of his ass or not?

Read the article HERE if you missed it earlier

(via NYTimes)

PS: This picture is cool-->



PPS: 100 POSTS!! WOOO!!

Random thoughts from people our age

Keefer Madness had a great find a few days back- Random Thoughts From People Our Age. On further examination, it looks like this is originally from Ruminations, but hey- Keefer found it.

HT to the lovely Ms. Jasmine for this find

FTA: (my favorites in bold)

Random Thoughts From People Our Age

I wish Google Maps had an "Avoid Ghetto" routing option.

More often than not, when someone is telling me a story all I can think about is that I can't wait for them to finish so that I can tell my own story that's not only better, but also more directly involves me.

Nothing sucks more than that moment during an argument when you realize you're wrong.

I don't understand the purpose of the line, "I don't need to drink to have fun." Great, no one does. But why start a fire with flint and sticks when they've invented the lighter?

Have you ever been walking down the street and realized that you're going in the complete opposite direction of where you are supposed to be going? But instead of just turning a 180 and walking back in the direction from which you came, you have to first do something like check your watch or phone or make a grand arm gesture and mutter to yourself to ensure that no one in the surrounding area thinks you're crazy by randomly switching directions on the sidewalk.

That's enough, Nickelback.

I totally take back all those times I didn't want to nap when I was younger.

Is it just me, or are 80% of the people in the "people you may know" feature on Facebook people that I do know, but I deliberately choose not to be friends with?

Do you remember when you were kids playing Nintendo and it wouldn't work? You take the cartridge out, blow in it and that would magically fix the problem. Every kid in America did that, but how did we all know how to fix the problem? There was no internet or message boards or FAQ's. We just figured it out. Today's kids are soft.

There is a great need for sarcasm font.

Sometimes, I'll watch a movie that I watched when I was younger and suddenly realize I had no idea what the f was going on when I first saw it.

I think everyone has a movie that they love so much it actually becomes stressful to watch it with other people. I'll end up wasting 90 minutes shiftily glancing around to confirm that everyone's laughing at the right parts, then making sure I laugh just a little bit harder (and a millisecond earlier) to prove that I'm still the only one who really, really gets it.

How the hell are you supposed to fold a fitted sheet?

I would rather try to carry 10 plastic grocery bags in each hand than take 2 trips to bring my groceries in.

I think part of a best friend's job should be to immediately clear the computer history if you die.

The only time I look forward to a red light is when I’m trying to finish a text.

A recent study has shown that playing beer pong contributes to the spread of mono and the flu. Yeah… if you SUCK at it!

Was learning cursive really necessary?

“LOL” has gone from meaning, "laugh out loud" to "I have nothing else to say."

I have a hard time deciphering the fine line between boredom and hunger.

Answering the same letter three times or more in a row on a Scantron test is absolutely petrifying.

My brother's Municipal League baseball team is named the Step-dads. Seeing as none of the guys on the team are actual step-dads, I inquired about the name. He explained, "Cuz we beat you, and you hate us." Classy, bro.

Whenever someone says "I'm not book smart, but I'm street smart" all I hear is "I'm not real smart, but I'm imaginary smart."

How many times is it appropriate to say "What?" before you just nod and smile because you still didn't hear what they said?

I love the sense of camaraderie when an entire line of cars teams up to prevent a dick from cutting in at the front. Stay strong, brothers!

Every time I have to spell a word over the phone using 'as in' examples, I will undoubtedly draw a blank and sound like a complete idiot. Today I had to spell my boss's last name to an attorney and said "Yes that's G as in...(10 second lapse)..ummm...Goonies."

What would happen if I hired two private investigators to follow each other?

While driving yesterday I saw a banana peel in the road and instinctively swerved to avoid it. Thanks, Mario Kart.

MapQuest really needs to start their directions on #5. Pretty sure I know how to get out of my neighborhood.

Obituaries would be a lot more interesting if they told you how the person died.

I find it hard to believe there are actually people who get in the shower first and THEN turn on the water.

I would like to officially coin the phrase 'catching the swine flu' to be used as a way to make fun of a friend for hooking up with an overweight person. Example: "Pat caught the swine flu last night."

I can't remember the last time I wasn't at least kind of tired.

Bad decisions make good stories

Whenever I'm Facebook stalking someone and I find out that their profile is public, I feel like a kid on Christmas morning who just got the Red Ryder BB gun that I always wanted. 546 pictures? Don't mind if I do!

Is it just me or do high school girls get sluttier & sluttier every year?

If Carmen San Diego and Waldo ever got together, their offspring would probably just be completely invisible.

Why is it that during an ice-breaker, when the whole room has to go around and say their name and where they are from, I get so incredibly nervous? Like I know my name, I know where I'm from. This shouldn't be a problem....

You never know when it will strike, but there comes a moment at work when you've made up your mind that you just won’t do anything productive for the rest of the day.

Can we all just agree to ignore whatever comes after DVDs? I don't want to have to restart my collection.

There's no worse feeling than that millisecond you're sure you are going to die after leaning your chair back a little too far.

I'm always slightly terrified when I exit out of Word and it asks me if I want to save any changes to my ten page research paper that I swear I did not make any changes to.

"Do not machine wash or tumble dry" means I will never wash this. Ever.

I hate being the one with the remote in a room full of people watching TV. There's so much pressure. 'I love this show, but will they judge me if I keep it on? I bet everyone is wishing we weren't watching this. It's only a matter of time before they all get up and leave the room. Will we still be friends after this?'

I hate when I just miss a call by the last ring (Hello? Hello? Dammit!), but when I immediately call back, it rings nine times and goes to voicemail. What'd you do after I didn't answer? Drop the phone and run away?

I hate leaving my house confident and looking good and then not seeing anyone of importance the entire day. What a waste.

When I meet a new girl, I'm terrified of mentioning something she hasn't already told me but that I have learned from some light internet stalking.

I like all of the music in my iTunes, except when it's on shuffle, then I like about one in every fifteen songs in my iTunes.

Why is a school zone 20 mph? That seems like the optimal cruising speed for pedophiles...

Sometimes I'll look down at my watch 3 consecutive times and still not know what time it is.

I keep some people's phone numbers in my phone just so I know not to answer when they call. (You mean you don’t? DUH!)

Even if I knew your social security number, I wouldn't know what do to with it.

Even under ideal conditions people have trouble locating their car keys in a pocket, hitting the G-spot, and Pinning the Tail on the Donkey – but I’d bet my ass everyone can find and push the Snooze button from 3 feet away, in about 1.7 seconds, eyes closed, first time every time.

My 4-year old son asked me in the car the other day "Dad what would happen if you ran over a ninja?" How the hell do I respond to that?

It really pisses me off when I want to read a story on CNN.com and the link takes me to a video instead of text.

I wonder if cops ever get pissed off at the fact that everyone they drive behind obeys the speed limit.

I think the freezer deserves a light as well.

I disagree with Kay Jewelers. I would bet on any given Friday or Saturday night more kisses begin with Miller Lites than Kay.

The other night I ordered takeout and when I looked in the bag, saw they had included four sets of plastic silverware. In other words, someone at the restaurant packed my order, took a second to think about it, and then estimated that there must be at least four people eating to require such a large amount of food. Too bad I was eating by myself. There's nothing like being made to feel like a fat bastard before dinner.

Classy.

OH GOD RUN IT'S A HIPPO

Fact: Hippos can run faster than Usain Bolt
Fact: Hippos can bite a 10-foot crocodile clean in two
Fact: Hippos can FUCK YOU UP



Oh look it's a hippo!



oh shit, it's coming at me...



HOLY SHIT RUN
This hippo is either really slow or this dude is faster than Usain Bolt




Fact: Hippos can FUCK YOU UP.

via Dailymail

2 girls 1 bike

Holy moly this is my new favorite sport

wow.

Emails from Crazy People

I read emailsfromcrazypeople.com just about every day, but this letter is by FAR the best in their entire collection. Ethan Albright is PISSED about his player rating in Madden '07. I'll reprint the letter in its entirety below but first, some highlights

You know what, John? Two can play this game. I rate you a fucking 12. I rate you a fucking 12 in Ethan Albright Football 2000-ever except for in the category of ball-licking. That is where I will spot you a 98 rating. You will receive this score because I will never give your blubbery ass a 99 in any category. Take that, pencil-dick.

...

It’s also pretty wonderful that my awareness rating was 59. You make it sound like I wake up in the morning, helplessly shit and piss myself, then lose three of my teeth before I discover that I am trying to eat a rock for breakfast. Fuck, John, I understand you saying that I am slow and lacking athleticism, but a rating like this pretty much labels me as retarded.

...

I have received the impression that you feel that I am lacking in the agility category. I should consider a walk through my living room where I don’t crash through a wall or kick over furniture a resounding success. My agility rating on your game is 33. It makes it sound like I just topple over if I start walking too fast. Ted Washington is rated a 40 in agility. He is listed at 365 pounds. If Ted Washington tied a white lady up and made her wear a metal bikini, he’d look just like Jabba the Hut.

Oh I'm so happy right now. The letter in its glorious, glorious entirety.

To: John Madden
CC: Electronic Arts Sports
From: Ethan Albright
Re: Being the worst rated player on Madden ‘07

Hi, John, my name is Ethan Albright. I play line for the Washington Redskins. You probably already knew that, so I’ll continue. I am writing in regards to the overall player rating of 53 that I have received in Madden NFL Football 2007. I feel that this is fucking bullshit and you should kiss my mother-fucking ass. Ahmed Carroll was rated a 78 and the Packers just cut his ass on a Tuesday morning after his performance in a Monday night game. That is pretty terrible. The worst part is that his overall rating was sniffing 80.

You know what, John? Two can play this game. I rate you a fucking 12. I rate you a fucking 12 in Ethan Albright Football 2000-ever except for in the category of ball-licking. That is where I will spot you a 98 rating. You will receive this score because I will never give your blubbery ass a 99 in any category. Take that, pencil-dick. Go do Al Micheals or something. Boom.

It’s also pretty wonderful that my awareness rating was 59. You make it sound like I wake up in the morning, helplessly shit and piss myself, then lose three of my teeth before I discover that I am trying to eat a rock for breakfast. Fuck, John, I understand you saying that I am slow and lacking athleticism, but a rating like this pretty much labels me as retarded. Rod Hate Me Smart has a 52 in this category. Electronic Arts is saying that seven rating points separate me and the breathing embodiment of the perfect oxymoron. Rod Smart struggled to arrange words in sentence form. Cave men had better hold of the English language. The only actions that separate point values of ignorance at this embarrassing level are things like using your own toothbrush to wipe your ass. I basically edged out Rod by my lack of shit teeth. If I take a night school class, could you bump me up to a 60?

I guess I just can’t fathom the fact that I am the absolute worst player rated out of the entire NFL. Fuck, man, there are some shitty guys out there. Amongst everyone, I was rated the absolute worst.

I have received the impression that you feel that I am lacking in the agility category. I should consider a walk through my living room where I don’t crash through a wall or kick over furniture a resounding success. My agility rating on your game is 33. It makes it sound like I just topple over if I start walking too fast. Ted Washington is rated a 40 in agility. He is listed at 365 pounds. If Ted Washington tied a white lady up and made her wear a metal bikini, he’d look just like Jabba the Hut.

John, you are such a fucking dick. I also noticed that my kick return rating was a 0. I was rated a fucking zero? So you feel that I shouldn’t even receive a 10, or even a 5? You are pretty much saying that I couldn’t even fall forward on a ball kicked in my direction. I would just stand there and let the ball bounce off of my fucking face. Fuck that, John, I returned an onside kick 6 yards in 2002. You should have just slapped a – 4 on me and had the EA staff ambush me with paintball guns.

Finally, I would like to comment on an unlikely topic, my pass coverage ratings. I see that I am a better at man-to-man coverage (31) than zone (21). Fuck me sideways with a lunchbox. Where did these scores even come from? How much time is spent coming up with the pass coverage ratings of offensive lineman? Can I have that job? Let’s see here, I think that Orlando Pace would be slightly better at jumping intermediate routes than Larry Allen. While I’m at it, I can assign the passing ratings for offensive lineman as well. I can use mine as a guide.

I was rated with a throwing power of 17 and accuracy of 16. Orlando Pace has a 22 power and 17 accuracy rating. Did someone at EA really put time into figuring out that Orlando Pace edges out Ethan Albright in both throwing power and accuracy? I will challenge him any day. My horrible passer ratings are of greatest misfortune to my son, Red Beard Jr. The poor boy is not only hideously ugly and covered by freakishly large freckles. He also has to suffer through playing catch with me and my senile-elderly-woman-type passer ratings. A session of tossing the pigskin usually consists of me missing my son by thirty yards in sporadic directions. I led him in front of a fire truck once and my wife kicked my ass. This is because of my 76 toughness rating. Yes, a 76 is far better than the other ratings, but I’m a fucking lineman, damn it. NFL Linemen are considered to be synonymous with toughness. According to your game, I am a retarded, uncoordinated, pussy-ass fuckwad that can’t fall on a kickoff, throw, or spell. I am, however, slightly better at manning up on a receiver than dropping into zone coverage. You lose your mind more and more each year, old man.

Fuck you, John. Please expect to find red pubes in various meals you consume for the rest of your life. If you fuck with Ethan Albright, you call down the thunder.

Rot in Hell,

Ethan Albright

Video games with real guns? YES PLEASE!

This might just be the best idea ever- integrate shooting games with guns!

These guys take Half-Life, a projector screen, and some accelerometers and turn the video game into a shooting range.



Still, I wanna say that the best part is the Gizmodo article about this video- it was titled "Half-Life Played With Real Guns Is Jack Thompson's Wet Dream (Updated: Jack Thompson Responds)"

Check out Jack Thompson's response (FTA):

John, you're terribly confused. Something that further glamorizes killing humans in virtual reality would not be my wet dream. That would be Strauss Zelnick's wet dream.
I'm the guy who opposes this stuff, who has lobbied against it for ten years, and who has been doing everything I can to stop massacres, not foster them.
So just how would what I oppose give me a wet dream? And why would you use such a gross image?
Well, the answer to both questions is in this answer: You have no earthly idea what you are talking about and you have a Jack Thompson obession.
Please report my response to your idiotic headline. [Ed note: Gladly!]

Oh I'm very happy right now

(via Gizmodo)

How do you spend your day?

And how does it stack up against everybody else in the US? The New York Times has a nifty article on an annual time use survey that tells you patently obvious things like "unemployed people sleep more and spend more time in the house" and "employed people spend less time watching TV than unemployed people."

More interesting, in my opinion, is the uber-cool interactive data chart that comes with the article. Play around and see that apparently, black people watch more TV than whites or hispanics, and people with children actually seem to work MORE than people without. Interesting....

via the New York Times

The New Yorker on Healthcare Reform

Last month, the New Yorker published an incredible piece about healthcare reform, and it's up online for you to read for free! Atul Gawande really dives deep into the system with a few case analyses, looking at both ends of the healthcare spectrum. Without being obnoxious about value judgments, Gawnade is able to paint an amazing picture of the current state of healthcare in the US, as well as the problems associated with the economic incentives created by the system in place.

He's got some really interesting tidbits, like this one (FTA):

Providing health care is like building a house. The task requires experts, expensive equipment and materials, and a huge amount of coordination. Imagine that, instead of paying a contractor to pull a team together and keep them on track, you paid an electrician for every outlet he recommends, a plumber for every faucet, and a carpenter for every cabinet. Would you be surprised if you got a house with a thousand outlets, faucets, and cabinets, at three times the cost you expected, and the whole thing fell apart a couple of years later? Getting the country’s best electrician on the job (he trained at Harvard, somebody tells you) isn’t going to solve this problem. Nor will changing the person who writes him the check

It's a long read, but definitely block off some time and check it out. It's on the New Yorker's online page, but even so, this article almost makes me want to resubscribe...

via the New Yorker

Dance off with the Star Wars Stars

Literally everything about this video makes me happy.



From Chewie in Kanye shades (more about those later) to Vader busting out to MC Hammer to Stormtrooper backup dancers to Asoka and the gals doing the single ladies dance... It's PERFECT!

Definitely watch this one the whole way through

Modeling the hip-hop ecosystem on IR theory

NPR has a great story by Mark Lynch linking hip-hop drama to international diplomacy and intrigue. The short version linked above really doesn't do the intricacies of the argument justice, take a look at the full article from NPR's foreign policy opinion section. FTA (block quote warning!):

See, Jay-Z (Shawn Carter) is the closest thing to a hegemon which the rap world has known for a long time. He's #1 on the Forbes list of the top earning rappers. He has an unimpeachable reputation, both artistic and commercial, and has produced some of the all-time best (and best-selling) hip hop albums including standouts Reasonable Doubt, The Blueprint and the Black Album. He spent several successful years as the CEO of Def Jam Records before buying out his contract a few months ago to release his new album on his own label. And he's got Beyonce. Nobody, but nobody, in the hip hop world has his combination of hard power and soft power. If there be hegemony, then this is it. Heck, when he tried to retire after the Black Album, he found himself dragged back into the game (shades of America's inward turn during the Clinton years?).

And again:

The changes in Jay-Z's approach over the years suggest that he recognizes the realist and liberal logic... but is sorely tempted by the neo-conservative impulse. Back when he was younger, Jay-Z was a merciless, ruthless killer in the "beefs" which define hip hop politics. He never would have gotten to the top without that. But since then he's changed his style and has instead largely chosen to stand above the fray. As Jay-Z got older and more powerful, the marginal benefits of such battles declined and the costs increased even as the number of would-be rivals escalated. Just as the U.S. attracts resentment and rhetorical anti-Americanism simply by virtue of being on top, so did Jay-Z attract a disproportionate number of attackers.

And more specifically, regarding Jay-Z's feud with Nas:

Nas opted to settle the beef, reconcile, and sign on with Def Jam Records — where he became one of Jay's leading and most valuable artists. In a world of unipolarity, both win through co-optation, reconciliation between enemies, and the demonstration that the gains of cooperation outweigh the gains of resistance.

The analysis is really incredible, and it brings out a side of the rap world that we don't usually get to see. I love to see articles bringing out the smarter side of the entertainment world- that it's not just a bunch of self-absorbed, insipid shells of people making noises pretending to be music up in the limelight selling millions of albums. I like to think that these people are much smarter than they seem, and that their personas are carefully composed, from Lady Gaga to Jay-Z.

Check the article out-
Foreign Policy: Jay-Z Schools Us In U.S. Hegemony- NPR

In honor of my main man Buzz

Watch Buzz Aldrin's face near the end when he calls him "Buzz Lightyear." Shit is classic.

If we landed on the moon TODAY

Well done, Slate.

My mind is officially blown

Wow. I've been opening bananas wrong my ENTIRE LIFE. Watch, as this brilliant man shows me the error of my (and most likely your) ways.



wow.

via Lifehacker

I love this person

Whoever you are, poster-posting person, I love you. So much.

OMG WANT WANT WANT

oh wow. I hope to be this good of a parent someday. Hell, I hope to be this good of a PERSON someday.

(via Geekologie)

EDIT: ohhhhhh i'm so unhappy it's fake. My new life goal is to make this beautiful dream a reality.

Fancy Fast Food

This person clearly had too much time on his hands. Three guesses as to what this is:
.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

If you guessed "Popeye's Chicken", you'd be right!!

FancyFastFood

Bolivian (?) newscasters FTW!

Well done, anonymous newscaster-lady. You managed to air stills from an episode of LOST and pass them off as photos from the "last moments of Air France Flight 447".

From the Youtube comments:

Bolivian TV channel PAT has been left looking a bit daft after broadcasting extraordinary images of the last moments of Air France flight 447, lost over the Atlantic on 1 June:

According to the report, the snaps were retrieved from a recovered Casio Z750, which was subsequently traced via the serial number to its owner - "Paulo G. Muller, an actor from a well-known children's theatre on the outskirts of Porto Alegre".

In fact, the camera can be traced to ABC Studios and sharp-eyed readers will notice that the photographs feature well-known actress Evangeline Lilly, aka Kate Austen from TV series Lost.

PAT has fallen hook, line and sinker for a hoax email, and to add to its embarrassment, has failed to appreciate that while the flight 447 disaster occurred at night, the images represent the daytime fictional break-up of Oceanic Flight 815

Welllll done. Nobody noticed that the crash happened AT NIGHT?

Check Jeff Koyen's blog for a nice little side-by-side of the footage from the Bolivian news channel and the episode of Lost.

Keep abreast of what's going on

Despite some of the skepticism concerning the value of Twitter and Facebook to protest groups in Iran, they remain basically the only way that people on the ground have been able to get information out. Here's one of the best ways to keep up with news from the ground.

TweetTabs lets you set up several twitter searches simultaneously and monitor them in real time. My current search tabs?
#iranelection OR Iranelection -RT
#tehran OR tehran -RT
#Mousavi OR mousavi -RT
#Iranelection video -RT
#basij OR basij -RT

the -RT is really important, it keeps the site from displaying what's known as "retweets" or just redundant information. I'm really happy with this site, use it to learn the news BEFORE it goes on CNN and BBC.

Christopher Walken makes my world go 'round

Christopher Walken is, I'm confident in saying, the most terrifying person on the planet. Luckily for us all, he may also be the most hilarious. And I have found the definitive impersonation. Ladies and gentlemen, I present to you... Jay Mohr.



Kills me every time.

Sandwich!

This captures how I feel so perfectly...

Why hasn't Al-Qaeda attacked the US again?

Slate's Timothy Noah published an absolutely incredible article trying to reason out exactly why we haven't been attacked again by Al-Qaeda. In it, he smartly avoids trying to pinpoint the exact reason, rather preferring to lay out each of seven competing theories, and arranging them on a scale of most comforting to most worrying. My favorite is the "Flypaper Theory." FTA (taken from an interview by Lt. Gen. Ricardo Sanchez)

This is what I would call a terrorist magnet, where America, being present here in Iraq, creates a target of opportunity, if you will. But this is exactly where we want to fight them. We want to fight them here. We prepared for them, and this will prevent the American people from having to go through their attacks back in the United States [italics mine].

While perhaps less plausible than some of the others, the idea really intrigues me. He's spot on in his arrangement- terrorists-are-dumb really is much more comforting than they just haven't gotten around to it yet.

This article is really long, but absolutely worth a read. Check it out and let me know what you think.

Link for those who missed it earlier- via Slate

Goverment fiber-optics cables annoy construction workers

Bruce Schneier quotes a really interesting story from the Washington Post about the construction going on at Tyson's Corner for the mall expansion and metro extension- apparently the government's got miles of black fiber laid across the region. This makes sense, seeing as NoVA's got an inordinate amount of governmental agencies dotting its landscape, but the funny part is that the fiber-optic cable isn't marked on any maps or plans.

These poor contractors are digging merrily away and then all of a sudden they hit a cable. Minutes later, men in suits pour out of black SUVs. FTA:

"Yeah, we heard about the black SUVs," said Paul Goguen, the engineer in charge of relocating electric, gas, water, sewer, cable, telephone and other communications lines to make way for Metro through Tysons. "We were warned that if they were hit, the company responsible would show up before you even had a chance to make a phone call."

One of the funnier stories quoted in the article is that of a company which happened to run afoul of these "men in black SUVs". Apparently, they showed up within seconds, refused to identify themselves, and then within hours an AT&T crew came to repair the wire. AT&T tried to bill them for the repairs. FTA:

Georgelas, the developer whose company was overseeing the work in 2000 when the Chevrolet Suburbans drove up to the Greensboro Corporate Center, said he figured that the government was involved when an AT&T crew arrived the same day to fix the line, rather than waiting days. His opinion didn't change when AT&T tried to bill his company for the work but immediately backed down when his company balked.

"These lines are not cheap to move," Georgelas said. "They said, 'You owe us $300,000.' We said, 'Are you nuts?' "

Well done, sir. Well done.

NEVER

Sooooo I haven't been posting so often... let's change that.



oh I love E3.

HAPPY MOTHER'S DAY

happy mother's day, mom

shamwow man strikes again

Hi, it's Vince with SlapChop



Holy fucking shit I love this guy.

(via Gizmodo)


EDIT: HE EXISTS IN SPANISH

Ambien makes you what now?

Apparently, Ambien can makes you sleepfuck. FTA:

At around 10 p.m., my wife commented on how productive I had been: mowing the lawn, cleaning up, grocery shopping. I remembered none of this and said so. She said her only concern was that I left for "errands" and returned two hours later with nothing in hand [...] This afternoon, I got a call from a woman who called me "lover" and asked when I wanted to come back. She called me her f--k buddy [...] I do not even know where she lives; maybe I phoned her for directions. I do find her attractive, but I am stunned that I did something like this.

Buddy, there are worse side effects you could have. I love Slate.

(via Slate)

OMG SWINE FLU OMG

Holy crap swine flu is spreading throughout the world like wildfire it's everywhere now we're all gonna die- wait.

Nope.

Here's the best part- we can all STILL EAT PORK. The WHO and CDC have said that the flu is NOT passed through the meat of the pig, so our delicious, delicious bacone is safe to eat. And stop banning our pork, China.

In other news, the second Israeli case of swine flu was confirmed earlier today. Israeli officials have responded by renaming it "Mexican Flu." Both mens' rabbis sigh in relief, while the 600 taco stands in Jerusalem quietly cringe and begin closing up shop.

And why the hell is OIL trading lower on swine flu news?

Why was this not at Spring Fair?

I CANNOT figure it out. I give you... the Bacone.

A bacon cone filled with scrambled eggs and country gravy topped with a biscuit.

Wow. That's sexy.


(via ThisIsWhyYoureFat.com)

Government-sponsored credit card wat?

Slate right now has an interesting piece out advocating for what they affectionately call the O-card- a government-issued credit card. FTA:

But instead of cracking down on companies that treat their customers poorly, why doesn't the government just offer a credit card of its own? After all, government regulation may help, but it's unlikely to solve the problems of the credit industry—namely, spiraling interest rates coupled with rising defaults. Obama likes to talk about constructive alternatives. Why not offer an O-card? With his face on it?

Hooooooooooly shit this could end poorly. They mention that many European countries have the same system in place but boy are we different. As they even mention, the European relationship with credit cards is much different from the current American love affair. They also mention that the government already backs home loans, car loans, student loans, and a bunch of other forms of credit that people have needs for- again, THESE THINGS ARE DIFFERENT (not that Fannie Mae and Freddie Mac did such a great job with these other types of loans either).

That aside, there are at least social policy goals behind government-sponsored home loans (leaving aside the fact that these goals may have gotten us into the financial crisis in the first place)- what are the goals behind the O-card? Allowing consumers to fall even farther into debt? Slate's even awkward about this, saying that they're not looking for people who would fall so far into debt that they'd default- FTA:

The caveat: You'd have to be supercreditworthy to get a card. The government doesn't want to have borrowers behind on payments; if they defaulted, taxpayers would have to pick up the tab. (Fannie Mae and Freddie Mac had higher standards than other lenders, too.)

What? How does that make any sense at all? Let's create this huge government credit card company, set it up with interest rates that would bankrupt the rest of the industry, and then only let the rich use it? Not only does that defeat the purpose of the whole exercise, it actually cripples the rest of the system- it leaves the actual credit card companies with the deadbeats and bums that aren't willing or able to pay their bills on time! Again, credit card debt is different from home loans or car loans or even student loans. Very few people have the capacity to go out and buy a car or a house on a whim when they're not financially able- but anybody can go use a credit card to buy a new pair of jeans. The average household has $8300 in credit card debt, and I'd wager that a boatload more aren't able to pay it on time each month .

The Consumerist blog comments have a really good summation of the reason this is terrifying in the first place.

Hmmm...a credit card that won't be bankruptable (as federal student loans are not now) issued by a lender who can garnish my wages if I don't pay? No thanks.

(via Slate via Consumerist, picture via Consumerist)

Texts from last night

Texts From Last Night may just be an invention on par with FMyLife... My current favorite:

(202): I am apparently in rockville maryland. I just threw up my tater tots I
had fro brunch in a safeway parking lot. Then ordered a pizza. Pepperoni and
pineapple. I'm sitting in the parking lot, next to my barf, waiting for my
pizza. WOOF. Someone just gave me an oxycontin tab. Can u come get me? I'm
scared

who knew so much hilarity could come from 160 characters and drunkenness?

O wait.

(via @ainetchian aka Madame Internetz)

Meat Cards

Yeah, this one I'm just gonna quote directly.

MEAT CARDS: BUSINESS CARDS MADE FROM MEAT AND LASERS
We start with 100% beef jerky, and SEAR your contact information into it
with a 150 WATT CO2 LASER.
Screw die-cutting. Forget about foil, popups, or
UV spot lamination. THESE business cards have two ingredients:MEAT AND
LASERS.
Unlike other business cards, MEAT CARDS will retain value after the
econopocalypse. Hoard and barter your calorie-rich, life-sustaining
cards.
Also: TWEETMEAT. Tweet your friends... IN
MEATSPACE.
Follow @MEATCARDS
on Twitter for on-sale announcements.

And, from Twitter:

We did not realize that MEAT and LASERS are both in the first period of the
PERIODIC TABLE of AWESOME!

Looks like they've got something for you vegetarians out there too!

@bre @ctpctp Why, I do believe you'd be
interested in our BEET Jerky cards.

I don't know that I love anything more than this website right now.

(via MEATCARDS)

AYDS diet pills

shamWOW

Oh, how I love outsourcing

More American Workers Outsourcing Own Jobs Overseas

Success.

I has it.

Dominos Pizza UPDATE UPDATE

Wow, I love the internet. Consumerist is reporting that the three commenter detectives that tracked down the pizza snotting people have been tracked down themselves- by Dominos Corporate HQ. They decided to send them a big thank you- in the form of a year of free pizza. Holy wow!

Additionally, AdvertisingAge has a really interesting article up analysing Dominos' response to the whole debacle. According to them, the first 24 hours of the response (basically silence) was real shitty, but the rest of what they did was spot-on. FTA:

"After the first 24 hours, they were largely textbook," he said. "They started a Twitter account, separated themselves from the villains, shut down the store, apologized, went to their demographic, went to YouTube -- I think all of that is great. People can take their stabs if they want, on every nuance of what Domino's has done, but after the first 24 hours, it's largely textbook."

There's a textbook? Where do I get that?

(via Consumerist and AdvertisingAge)

59% Interest WTF??

According to national newspaper of note the Knoxville News Sentinel, a Tennessee couple was charged an astounding 59% interest on a $5000 loan. And you thought your mortgage was bad. They're claiming that this was a predatory loan, and that they were never actually informed of the terms and interest charged.Here's the really incredible gem FTA:

Brown says the company never sent paperwork explaining the terms of the loan. "I ain't got no knowledge of spelling and writing, but the Lord gave me a good memory," Brown says. "And I know they never said anything about 59 percent interest."

Oh, Tennessee.

(via the Knoxville News Sentinel via Consumerist)

MATTHEW PERRY IS ONE OF US

FTA:

Former Friends star Matthew Perry was forced to seek medical attention after damaging his hand playing videogames.
Perry says, "I play a lot of video games a lot of XBox 360. I played Fall Out 3 so often I had to go to a hand doctor. I used my hand too much and had to get injections in it"

I want to be him someday.

(via Geekologie and Yahoo! News)

Online games come offline

Massively Multiplayer Online games (or MMOs) have gotten HUGE in the past few years, with World of Warcraft being the most popular one to date (goddamn you, Blizzard...). But more and more, these MMOs are moving away from their purely online roots and entering real life, either physically or (more prominently) financially.

On Tax Day, the Market Design blog (which everyone should read, it's incredible) did a post on real money trading in MMOs. This is an incredible phenomenon that's so wide-reaching that entire business models have sprung up dedicated solely to creating and selling World of Warcraft gold and a simple ebay search reveals a slew of options. Eurogamer recently did a four-part investigation on so-called "gold-farming" epidemic in online gaming. It turns out that gold farmers are a hugely organized group of people, with some of the larger companies raking in millions of dollars each month, in some instances. And the people who buy it are just regular people all around the world who simply don't have the time to do the gruntwork that these companies will do for them (for a fee, of course).

The companies behind these MMOs are fighting back, to some extent, by introducing not only new anti-trading and hacking mechanisms, but by rolling out real-world trading systems of their own, in a sort of "if you can't beat 'em, join 'em" mentality. These officially-sanctioned versions have so far been at least moderately successful in stemming the tide of real-world trading in these online games.

However, while gold farming may be the best-publicized way that online goods make it offline, it's by no means the only one. Free-to-play MMO Second Life has been making waves with their business model which flies in the face of most conventional games. To be honest, Second Life isn't really a "game" at all. There are no objectives, no game-play mechanics, no real rules, no goals, and no way to win or lose. What it does have, however, is an incredibly extensive world that users can explore to their hearts' content, and money. Lots and lots of money.

In-game currency is called the Linden dollar, and this currency is explicitly tradable with US dollars. The economy is almost purely a free-market system, and the GDP of the game was estimated at between $500 million and $600 million in 2007. One of the few exceptions to the free-market system is that each account receives a starting balance of money and used to receive a small stipend, but other than that, users are free to find jobs, start businesses, buy and sell real estate, create in-game "products' and sell them, or do pretty much whatever else they please.

This is where the genius of the game really shows, in its users' creativity. Users can do anything from design clothing to cars to houses to pretty much anything they want, but people are drawn to what they know. In one of the most incredible cases, an actual bank was created (Ginko Financial) which offered users up to 40% interest on their in-game currency deposits. After Linden Labs enacted new restrictions on in-world gambling (which was being used to make bets on real-world events), a huge number of investors made their way over to the Ginko Financial in-world ATMs- and found that they couldn't. Ginko Financial ended up with over 200 million Linden dollars in obligations (translating to about $740,000 in real-world money) and had no way to pay it back except to convert depositors into bond-holders on an exchange which may or may not actually exist or be profitable. $740,000 up in smoke! Linden Labs responded by outright banning any in-game banks which paid interest (after users began protesting en masse for financial institutions to be regulated), and analysts have pointed to this event as the precursor to our own financial crisis.

This isn't unique to Second Life, either. EVE Online, another MMO known for its in-game financial dynamics, was hit in 2006 by a massive scam where a player started an investment bank, let it run for a while, and then ran with the profits (LINK:) These amounted to over 700 billion in in-game currency, or around $100,000 if sold. Making matters more hilarious, he spread rumors about himself dying real-world just to throw investigators off the scent.

It's not just scamming going on in these games, either. The Second Life real estate market is alive and vibrant and entrepreneurs are a dime a dozen. Actual real-world real estate brokerages are entering the market, such as Coldwell Banker, which hopes to compete aggressively on price and "bring real estate to the masses. In EVE Online, the virtual corporate world is intensely competitive and the markets are so realistic in some aspects that they're regarded as a decent way to learn the ropes.

And then there's research. Economics maybe, but nobody would have thought that MMOs could provide viable case studies for legitimate medical and sociological research. Enter Corrupted Blood.

The Corrupted Blood plague was really nothing more than an in-game glitch gone horribly horribly wrong. It was meant as a spell used by one of the in-game bosses which was supposed to be confined to a certain area. Eventually, it got out and spread like wildfire, depopulating cities within hours and killing hundreds of thousands of characters. Researchers used the data about the plague transmission and player responses to create real world models of what would happen in the event of a pandemic, using the online data to fill in hard-to-model gaps in their knowledge about human behavior. One blog looked at the behavior of players and went so far as to label those intentionally spreading the plague as "in-game terrorists." Researchers were able to recognize factors they had not even considered when making previous models, including the aptly-named "stupid factor," where someone runs in for a look thinking they'll be fine, gets infected, then spreads the plague before dying.

All of these things come together to point to a massively increased role in the real world for "online" games. As well as being an immense opportunity for profit they point out flaws in our regulatory systems by mirroring them in their own, can act as "test tube societies" useful for modeling behavior not normally seen, and are often just a whole lotta fun. Running off with $100,000 in real money for nothing? Sheeeeeiiiit, I gotta get in on that.

Memorex - oh the memories

So, I grew up with oldies radio stations, Celine Dion on my tape player, and cassette tapes in my parents' cars. My favorite tape: Memorex.












Oh, cassette tapes, where have you gone? Don't you miss taping things right off the radio? Driving around with your tape ready to start taping as soon as that great Gloria Estefan hit came on the radio? Okay, so maybe not Gloria Estefan for you (but, come on, you know "the rhythm is gonna get you") Whitney Houston? Mariah Carey? Ace of Base?

Don't you miss reaching the end of the tape and taking it out, turning it around, and putting it back in to hear the other side? Don't you miss fastforwarding blindly, not knowing where you will stop, and being surprised with your favorite song - ultimate 1987 hit --> "I Just Died in Your Arms Tonight" by Cutting Crew. I mean, wow! What a feeling! And don't you miss when that favorite tape gets ruined when all the black tape stuffs comes out and you just can't wind it all back up?? Oh wait, that's a negative.... umm.

But anyway, yes, this is an ode to the tape. And that Memorex tape above was my favorite. It's clear plastic! It has pretty colors! And what a great slogan: "Is it live or is it Memorex?" Fabulous!


Anyone want to make me a mixed tape? Sigh. Those were the days... when tapes melted when you left them on your hot leather seats in the summer sun....

-J

Dominos Pizza employees UPDATE

So remember those gross Dominos employees that stuck cheese up their noses and shit? Remember how the internet caught them? Hell, even the BBC is reporting on 'em. Yeah, well now the cops have caught 'em too.

In a frankly admirable move, Dominos President Patrick Doyle made a youtube video detailing the company's response to these folks. Apparently, they got fired immediately, criminal charges were brought against them, warrants were issued for their arrest, and Dominos is all set to file a civil lawsuit against them as well. Video below:




You know it's bad when your mother is so embarrassed that she won't provide her name when giving an interview. What, you think the internet won't find out anyway?

So it looks like these two were in jail until they just yesterday posted bail. Here's the kicker, though: apparently the woman from the videos is a registered sex offender. Shit keeps getting weirder and weirder...

Barack Obama WAT

This makes me SO HAPPY. Barack Obama soundboard, anybody?

(via AprilWinchell.com)

Coin flipping now unfair. Goddammit.

So it turns out that even flipping a coin isn't fair anymore! According to Coding the Wheel, there's actually about a 51% chance that it'll end up on the side it started on. FTA:

The 50-50 proposition is actually more of a 51-49 proposition, if not worse. The sacred coin flip exhibits (at minimum) a whopping 1% bias, and possibly much more. 1% may not sound like a lot, but it's more than the typical casino edge in a game of blackjack.

Also, they've built a machine that can land a flipped coin on heads every time.

Dammit. Now we're back to throwing a cat with a piece of buttered toast strapped to its back in the air and figuring out which side it lands on.

(via Stanford- CAUTION: 31-page PDF)

I got to be UNSTOPPABLE

Lyrics

The part we're gonna take a look at is Lil Wayne's section, here it is:

[Wayne]
My name is weezy
I'm almost perfect
and i work harder than hard workin
bizarre circus
that's where my bar surface
therefore i act a clown
even when im laying on my back
im never backin down
so overstand me
i got a condo in Miami
and my doormat is always sandy
and i run louisiana
but ive never pulled a hammy
and i got a condo in Atlanta
and i always wear a bandanna
and when it comes down to stuntin
you boys is just buntin and
im swinging for the fence
your girl hanging from my dick
your girl sanging to my shit
like ah loli loli pop
she say i get that pussy wetter than a designer shop
she say i get that pussy better
better than her gynecologist
hoe just text me
everybody want some mo dick mo dick
old bitch
young bitch
but i be like damnnnn
all i got is one dick

So to be honest, this doesn't need much commentary. I can't resist tho, so I'm just gonna reprint some choice portions.

even when im laying on my back
im never backin down
so overstand me

overstand is not a word. I'm sorry, it's just not.

and i run louisiana
but ive never pulled a hammy
and i got a condo in Atlanta
and i always wear a bandanna

what?

she say i get that pussy wetter than a designer shop
she say i get that pussy better
better than her gynecologist

ew.

everybody want some mo dick mo dick
old bitch
young bitch
but i be like damnnnn
all i got is one dick

soooo this one needs some explanation. At first you might be like "well of course he's only got one dick, how many would he have?" Here you've got to keep in mind Lil Wayne's previous work.


Key Lyrics:

We are not the same, I am a martian (martian, martian)
We are not the same, I am a martian (martian, martian)
Greetings from Planet Weezy
We will begin transmission in 5...4...3...2...1

And as we all know, martians can have multiple penises. Oh wait, those are koalas. Damn.

(Hat tip to my brother Sina for this one)

Internet 1, Idiot Dominos Employees 0

So in what may be the most incredible bout of e-sleuthing I have ever seen, Consumerist commenters have managed to track down the individuals responsible for these disgusting videos (click through for the Consumerist page, all videos SFW). In a nutshell, two Dominos employees took some videos of each other doing disgusting things to the food they were about to send to customers, including sneezing on the food, putting cheese up their nose and then back onto the sandwiches, and rubbing a kitchen sponge between their buttcheeks before using it to clean a pot.

Enter e-sleuthing.

Based on nothing more than the Youtube username (whiteair2- now defunct) of the uploaders, a brief glimpse of the view from a window as the camera panned past the drive-thru (visible for like 2 seconds about a third of the way through the third video), and the accent of the individuals, Consumerist commenters were able to not only find their approximate location but the exact store they worked for and the manager's email address and phone number. Needless to say, they sent off some emails immediately (including a few to Dominos corporate) and whooooooo is this gonna turn into a shitshow for those two dumbasses. Take a look at the comment string in question:

Amy Wilson
8:42 PM on Mon Apr 13 2009

A Google search for whiteair2's only friend on YouTube, lilangel6979, brings up an email address with the same lilange6979l username connected with an old Xanga page apparently from Houston. Its definitely not a sure thing, but it fits with the southern accents.
Amy Wilson A Google search for whiteair2's only friend on YouTube,...

katstermonster
8:51 PM on Mon Apr 13 2009
@Amy Wilson: southern? I got like....southern hemisphere from Christie. I was thinking Australian transplant for her...I didn't care to watch any more of the video in order to hear Michael's charming voice.
*

Amy Wilson
9:00 PM on Mon Apr 13 2009
@katstermonster: Yeah, I know what you mean. She did say "ya'll," though, and I thought Michael also had a southern accent.
*
whyerhead
9:18 PM on Mon Apr 13 2009
@Amy Wilson:
Amy.. I FOUND IT! Dominos Pizza, Conover NC. How did I find it? I used part of your intel. Googled for lilangel6979, found the myYearbook for that email, looked at the city.. Theres a Jack in the box across from this dominos. Searched yellowpages.com for it, found it at 509 10th St NW, Conover NC. Jack in the Box is at 510 10th st NW. I'm not sure how to get in contact with the folks at dominos corporate.. but, I'm sure they're reading our blog by now.

Amy Wilson
9:51 PM on Mon Apr 13 2009
@whyerhead: AWESOME work, whyerhead!!!!! I checked Google street view for that address, and it matches up perfectly with the sign in the video about making change. Amazing!

Microshock
10:48 PM on Mon Apr 13 2009
@whyerhead:
I called them and the manager was on the phone, i asked if he knew christi and michael, he said yes, and i said, do you know what they've done?
He says no , so i tell him, and he's like wow, that's horrible, give me the site so i can check it out when i get home and to call linda the store manager in the morning

Amy Wilson
10:56 PM on Mon Apr 13 2009
@Microshock: My boyfriend e-mailed Tim McIntyre, Vice President for Communications @ Dominos, and just received the following:

From: "Tim McIntyre (COMM - Communicat)"
Date: April 13, 2009 10:48:04 PM EDT
To: Jonathan Drake
Subject: Re: Video Location identified!

Thank you. I'm alerting our chief of security right away.

Sent from my iPhone

On Apr 13, 2009, at 10:21 PM, "Jonathan Drake" wrote:

Dear Mr. McIntyre,

It appears that readers of the popular blog "Consumerist" have
identified the location of the Dominos that featured so prominently in
some rather disgusting online videos. The restaurant in question
appears to be the one located at:

509 10th St NW, Conover, North Carolina

The article, in which online sleuths "Amy Wilson" and "whyerhead" made
the discovery, can be accessed at the following URL. The discussion in
question occurs on page two of the comments:

[consumerist.com]

Yours,

Jonathan Drake, concerned consumer.

Ooooooo are they gonna get it.....

(via Consumerist)